We make the mistake of equating ourselves with our emotions and thoughts. But we are neither our emotions nor our thoughts. They are ours, but we are not them. But if we don’t take ownership, they will take ours. No man should be a slave to his brain or heart.
People who cannot control their thoughts become subservient to them. Those who commit a crime are examples of such thought slavery. By having an angry thought, you don’t need to become angry. By having a disappointing thought, you are not required to be depressed. It is only one thought of despair. Your life is much more than just one thought. Rather, you should watch that thought from a safe distance and observe it without being affected by it. It is not easy, but it can be developed through practice.
You may have seen people who spoil their whole life because of one thought or emotion. For the love or hate of a person, they forget all other aspects of life. It becomes the sole purpose of their life. It may be a temporary, partial reflection of their current state. Remember that thought is only one part of our lives. Because of having a feeling of revenge against one person, our life becomes bitter. We cannot sleep at night. The poison of hatred keeps us burning from inside. Is this wise? No. Life is worth much more than such emotions.
Whenever we pass through such a situation, we should sit down in a silent place. Observe our life in the context of a larger perspective. We cannot be slaves to one emotion or thought. We need to be in control of our thoughts, like a charioteer controls his horses. Shri Krishna says in Bhagavad Gita Chapter 6, Shloka 26:
यतो यतो निश्चरति मनश्चञ्चलमस्थिरम् |
ततस्ततो नियम्यैतदात्मन्येव वशं नयेत् || 26||
Which translates as follows:
"Whenever and wherever the restless and unsteady mind wanders, one should bring it back and continually focus it on God."
Lord Krishna advises us to bring back our focus to God whenever the restless and unsteady mind wanders. Indeed, the mind is always restless and unsteady. It tends to wander. But a wise person should be quick to identify such activity of the mind and bring it back to focus on good. Never drag yourself along with your wandering mind; you will be lost and directionless. It takes an effort to stay steady. Meditation takes time. You cannot control your thoughts through meditation in a day. Regular practice can help you achieve it, though. Mindfulness, watching thoughts without judging them, helps us to know that we are not our thoughts. They are only appearing in our minds, and it is up to us whether to act on them or not. If we fail to distinguish, our chariot will be taken away by the horses, where they desire.
The Persian poet Rumi noted, ‘thoughts are guests.’ So treat them as guests, not as owners of the house. Welcome them, respect them, but don’t give them control of your house. Don’t let them decide what to do and how to do it. One should remember that thoughts may be good or bad, but they don't have the capacity to make us good or bad. Even a person with bad thoughts is not necessarily evil. Because thoughts are like clouds in the sky. They cannot spoil the sky. They may cover the sky, patch it, but cannot permanently change or spoil the sky. Can they affect the purity and supremacy of the sky in any manner? Clouds have to go.
Similarly, thoughts are temporary phenomena through which our mind tries to direct us in a particular direction. They are appearing for a reason. Maybe because of some historical or present event happening in our lives. Or due to some past karma, or because of the influence of our company. But they are only a nudge. We don’t need to be steered by them. Once we start understanding this fact and learn to watch them from a distance, they lose the ability to control us. Our independence becomes more prominent. We remain in control of ourselves in all conditions, regardless of good or bad thoughts. Decisions remain in our power. As we continue to observe thoughts, we become calm. Such controlled calmness becomes part of our personality, naturally.
